Copyright 2015 Jesse Gersten | All Rights Reserved.

Epileptic Talking Pinball


If anyone has had the good fortune to spend 90 minutes of their life with nothing more productive to do but watch the movie Radio, and happens to be wondering where he’s working today, the answer is at Wendy’s. Radio was the classic film seeing Cuba Gooding Jr. stretch his natural thespian abilities to portray a retarded guy who helps a football team develop some character and unite as one race, the human race. Even though Cuba Gooding Jr. plays retarded characters in most of his movies, such as the retarded cowboy he played with Crocodile Dundee, and the retarded sled dog racer in Snow Dogs, and the retarded football player he played in Jerry McGuire, I never thought I he could pull off a retarded football team’s assistant. Brilliant! I also thought I was never going to receive my change at Wendy’s. After handing him the bill, he held it in the air as if he was checking for watermarks to ensure that I wasn’t paying for my chicken nuggets with counterfeit currency. But he just held the bill up in the air for about a minute before yelling out “20! 20 DOLLARS!!” Fantastic. Now that we’ve established that, maybe we could get around to the daunting task of choosing a dipping sauce. Before we could start that process he started running around bumping into things behind the counter like an epileptic talking pinball. 10 to 1 odds say he loses an ear in the fry percolator. The manager was quite amusing as well, with his bright blue managerial shirt making him way too flirty considering he had 17 different types of ACNE decorating the puffy skin adorning his skull.


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